Rough Patch
by BAHBEEPBO
Summary: Will and JJ hit a rough time in their marriage and are on the verge of breaking up. Is their love strong enough to withstand the one night stands and stolen kisses? As everything they stood for slowly crumbles down and secrets come unravelled, will they come out a couple or decide to split ways? AU
1. Chapter 1

**Prologue**

Will tucks Henry in and kisses his head.

"I wanna wait for Mummy to come home."

"Nah, Mummy's coming home pretty late today. How about we give her a call okay?" Will says, dialing her number.

Henry smiles and snuggles into his bed.

"Hey, Henry wants to say good night," Will says when she picks up.

"I'm sorry who's this on the line?" A man answers.

"JJ's husband," Will says, his voice straining a little.

"Oh, she left her mobile at my place. She left 40 minutes ago. I think she'll be home soon."

Will thanks the random stranger and sets the phone down.

"Mummy's gonna be back soon, I guess we can wait for her," he says, giving a half-smile.

Just as he flips open a bedtime storybook, he hears the car come in.

JJ flies up the stairs, sprinting almost towards the room.

Will can see that she's in a mess, but she calms down and speaks to Henry for a few moments before kissing his forehead and sending him to sleep.

The minute he closes Henry's door behind him, JJ latches on to him and starts sobbing violently into his arms. He doesn't speak; he simply waits for her to talk.

The words that come next were long expected.

Will could barely hear her whisper but he was confident of what she said.

"Will, I cheated."


	2. Chapter 2

**-whoops i realized i forgot to state that this is really a relationship story not a case story so if you're into that then great(:-**

**Will**

My heart sinks a little bit, but not because of what she did. She did something wrong, and she sprinted back home, bounded up the steps, tucked our child into bed and then confessed her sin.

I didn't even have the balls to man up and confess what I did.

"I'm so sorry," she cries.

I take her hand and we sit down on the edge of the bed.

"I cheated too, JJ," I say quietly.

It doesn't come as a shock to her. After all, she was a profiler.

"I know. Thrice. With that girl at the coffeehouse."

I swallow uncomfortably. We sit in complete silence and I wonder if this was going to be the end of our marriage. She rests her head on my shoulder and I sling my arm around her waist.

We fit together so perfectly, so how can something so perfect go so wrong?

And it wasn't that we didn't love each other. I did. I loved her more than anything else in the world. I have never and will never ever stop loving her – of that I was a hundred percent certain.

Then why couldn't we find comfort in each other's arms? We both knew we loved each other, so what was the problem?

It took me a really long time to figure this out, but love is not knowledge. Love is feeling. And we were so caught up in our own lives that we forgot how to feel.

"So is this how we end?" she asks hesitantly.

"Jesus Christ I hope not." I say.

"You know it will be so much simpler if I didn't love you," she says, half-laughing.

I chuckle.

"Yeah, that would be a hell lot easier."

I look at her for what seems like a century. I have caught glimpses of her over the past few years – her hair flying across the doorframe as she left for work; half of her face tucked in her pillow when she was fast asleep; when her head was slightly tilted as she kissed me.

But I haven't properly looked at her for a really, really long time.

And boy was she beautiful.

I forgot what I fell in love with.

"It doesn't have to end this way, JJ. It doesn't have to."

She's looking at me and there is so much hope in her eyes. She is almost begging me to give her a solution. I don't have a solution. But I have her. And I'm not going to let her go. Ever.

Her eyes slowly turn dreary as the silence wears on.

"I don't know a lot of things. But I do know that I love you and I know that we don't have to end as a sad story. I don't know how we're supposed to get through this but let's start with this," I say quietly, pausing at the end.

I lean down and kiss her gently.

"I love you."

And it was as simple and as complicated as that.

The next morning, she lies and calls in sick, something she hasn't done since she joined the squad, really.

We sent Henry to school together – a new first.

Then we just spent time together. We really spent time together, instead of the usual – her crouched in the corner, her forehead creased as she flipped through pages and pages of documents and me slacking on the couch, humoring Henry.

I have come to realize that spending time together doesn't mean being in the same room together.

We visited the park, we had a sit down proper lunch, we went shopping – she told me about her work and I told her about mine. Well, the unclassified parts of it.

It was a really nice day. And we hadn't shared days like this in a long time.

I can't remember how and when but it just slowly stopped. She couldn't make space in her schedule for me and I didn't work hard enough to deserve her time. We co-existed in harmony but that was all.

I can't remember when we stopped fighting. But I remember how much I missed those fights. I missed the way she used to push me away after we fought. I missed the way she threw out the pillow and made me sleep on the couch. I missed the way she would come out in the middle of the night and cuddle with me on the couch before sneaking back into our room. I missed the way she apologized – so softly, almost as if she hoped I didn't hear it. I missed the way she fought for, with and because of me.

And I missed the way she used to come home – worn out, unwilling to speak – and all she wanted and needed to do was hold me and all I needed to do was tell her that she was loved. Now all she does is crumble on to the bed or drink.

I missed all those things. I really did.

I can scratch my brains trying to find all the good memories we had but I can tell you easily all the bad ones we shared – the bad ones we made it through.

So I have no idea why I started flirting with the barista at the Starbucks down the street. I have no idea why I asked her for her number. I am even more clueless as to why I called her one night and went to her place. Thrice.

Maybe I just forgot how love was supposed to be. I forgot the chase. I forgot the sweet nothings and the flowers and the balloons and holding her hand as I walked her home. I forgot the nights under the stars and I forgot what it feels like to be so alive. I forgot how fast my heart beat every time I laid eyes on her. I forgot the butterflies in my stomach when she leaned into me.

Maybe that's why I tried to relive all these things with another girl. I don't even know her name. I slept with someone to try and get all these feelings back but I couldn't.

And I think I know why.

Because that girl isn't JJ.

And I don't want that girl.

I want JJ.

***read and review please* :D**


	3. Chapter 3

**woohoo:) thanks for all the reviews i seriously treasure every single one 3**

**JJ**

I don't know what's wrong with me.

I have a wonderful husband and kid waiting at home. And I know that very well. And I'm not drunk.

Yet when he starts tugging at my shirt, I don't make a sound.

Even when he unhooks my bra, I don't object.

In fact, I want him to continue. I feel a rush of excitement. I feel alive.

I don't feel these things with Will anymore.

And I've tried to control myself. This is the twenty-second date.

Twenty two times I have lied to Will about working late.

And that night, I betrayed William.

During the whole thing, I didn't feel remorseful. I didn't feel regret. In fact I actually enjoyed it. I did.

But the minute we were done, the minute we started cuddling and drifting off to sleep, it hit me. I felt so much pain and regret. I wanted to get it all out of me. The voices in my head weren't saying that "This was wrong" or "You shouldn't have done this". They were saying, "You have to tell Will the truth." And worse, "You have to break up with him."

Do I love Will? Sure I do. I fell for him harder and faster than I have ever fallen for anyone. And Jake, the man I just cheated with?

A part of me loved him too, but it was two different feelings. I guess, with Jake it was a young love where everything is new; everything is a first. And with Will it was mature love where you know everything there is to know about him. There are no new things to discover, no new delights, but the love for him is there and is pretty strong.

I don't know why I slept with Jake.

I don't know why I had 22 other dates with Jake when I should have been at home with Will and Henry.

Maybe it was just how perfect Jake seemed. Everything I had listed as a 16 year old under 'Perfect Boyfriend', Jake could check them all off the list. But honestly I think it was because he needed me. I liked being needed by someone. It made me feel important.

I used to feel like Will needed me, but now we barely find time to talk and on the rare occasions we do, it seems like he didn't really need me for life to go on.

And after I cheated and confessed, I called out of work. I hoped somehow if we spent more time together, this didn't need to happen. But I knew I was only lying to myself. I already had one foot out the door and there was really nothing he could do to change my mind.

But I gave him a day. And it was a really nice day. I was that close to changing my mind until I realized how all of this started.

We've been together for almost a decade now and he was my first real boyfriend. I had so many things to experience and do in life and so many more firsts. I know nothing but the comfort of Will's arms and the only reason we were growing stale is because I needed to find out who I am outside of us. I needed to find out if committing to Will and having Henry was a mistake. I needed to discover who I was before I could look him in the eye and tell him, Hey, I was right, I do want to spend the rest of my life with one and one person only.

And I will eventually say that.

But until I can truly be sure that I am going to say that to William LaMontague, I have to leave. I can't find myself when I'm around him all the time.

That's why after we put Henry to sleep, I told him I was sorry.

And I told him I needed to leave and it was best if we didn't see each other at all.

And I told him I was sorry to burden him with Henry and be a selfish prick.

But I told him I had to do this.

He didn't beg me to stay. He didn't even ask me to stay. He just nodded, understanding as ever, not even bothering to fight about this, and helped me shift my luggage into my car.

"Do you want a divorce?" he asks.

"I don't know."

"Okay. Just tell me if you want one and I'll get it settled. I hope you find whatever it is you're looking for."

And with that, we parted – without a kiss, a hug or a handshake.

Just words.

**review and leave any ideas you would like and i might try and work it in :D **


	4. Chapter 4

**Will**

"I wanna talk to Mommy," Henry shouted, kicking me angrily.

Damned.

"Did you just kick me?" I asked, my tone suddenly harsh.

He hesitated for a moment and went completely silent.

"I'm sorry," he whispers before dropping his head.

"Look, I tried calling her but she's not picking up," I say.

Henry looks at me with wide, unblinking eyes. I haven't told him how JJ left. I didn't know how.

"She's gonna come back real soon okay? You're already 6 and you can go to bed yourself. Think of how proud Mommy will be when she finds out!" I lie.

He gives me a wide grin and bounces up to bed.

I tuck him in and kiss him goodnight before I come back down to the kitchen.

I drink. More than I should.

Then I pass out on the kitchen counter.

And that happens every night for a month.

One night, Henry's demands for JJ became too loud. The beer tasted all too familiar. The missed calls suddenly cut deeper than they did before.

I haven't seen her or talked to her for one whole month. And I'm running out of things to numb the pain. My body was getting immune to the alcohol. Long rides in the car around town could not longer clear my mind.

It was 3am in the morning and Henry was crying from a bad dream. He dreamt that JJ got into an accident and got hurt real bad. I was sleep deprived. I was half drunk. I was angry and irrational.

So I lifted Henry into the car and drove to Reid's house.

I knew they had flown back since the news reported that their team solved the case. Reid was awake at 3.45 in the morning as usual and Henry lit up at the sight of him.

After he got Henry to sleep, I asked if he could babysit Henry for the day.

"Will, I don't think you should-"

"Reid, you don't understand. Just tell me where she's staying now."

"Will, I really don't-"

"Damned it Reid, I need to beg her to come back. Please, just give me her address."

He sighed and scribbled down her address for me. It was an apartment a few blocks away from the BAU headquarters. I thanked him and left.

Standing outside her apartment, I didn't know what to say. All the anger that built up in me; all the shouting I wanted to do just fizzled away. I just wanted to see her again, to see how she's doing.

To see if she was as messed up as me.

I was afraid. I really was. It was 4.30 in the morning and I was sobering up. I was losing courage. She was probably fast asleep now.

But I pounded my fist against the door.

Once, twice, continuously.

And suddenly the door yanked open and I caught myself before I fell in. A man was standing in front of me in his underpants, half-asleep and cursing me loudly. Who the hell was this guy?

All that anger just flowed back. The hurt and the pain that I thought I had pushed down just flowed back up.

One whole month of keeping my feelings bottled up led to this.

I wasn't proud of what I did next, but it had to be done.

I raised my fist and punched him.

He let out a loud howl and collapsed to the ground, holding his nose. Blood was streaming steadily out of his nostrils. My knuckles were already starting to turn blue-black.

And that moment when he was lying on the ground and I was standing up I learnt one of the most important lessons of my life. Causing pain to someone else doesn't make your own pain go away.

JJ stumbled out of the room, wrapped messily in a towel and I just knew they did it. Otherwise, she would be wearing clothes.

"Oh my god Will!" she shouted, crawling to the ground and checking on the man.

"Jake, I think your nose is broken. We need to get you down to the hospital."

And through this whole thing, I stood at the door, not even in her apartment, without a word.

She dressed and pushed past me without a word, helping that jerk down to her car. My hand was starting to swell up real bad and the physical pain was starting to hit me. I was tired and broken.

So I sat against her door and slept.


	5. Chapter 5

**JJ**

He was leaning against my door, sound asleep.

I slap him awake.

"Hnnf," he mumbled, waking up groggily.

I can see that his knuckles are completely bruised. No wonder Jake's nose broke. William did two things when he was angry. He worked out and he drank. It wasn't a good combination, especially for someone with a gun and police badge.

I kick him out of the way. He groans.

"Jennifer," he shouted, standing up in a hurry and sticking his foot in between my door and the frame to prevent it from closing.

"Damned it Will. You broke Jake's nose. What else do you want?" I ask.

He pushed the door open forcefully and dropped to his knees.

"I want you."

My heart drops.

"And you know you want me too."

I slap him.

"Why aren't you nursing Jake back to health? Why are you here?" he demanded.

"This is my home," I say, avoiding the question altogether.

"You're stating a irrelevant fact," he says, looking up at me with his puppy dog eyes.

I pause, because I know that's true. And I'm scared of how close I am to giving in. Not now. Not yet. I can feel myself cringing.

"What can Jake give you that I can't? I can be that guy for you. I can be whatever you want. I just want you back. You may not know this, Jennifer Jareau, but I need you. And you need me."

I swallow.

"Get up."

He scrambles to his feet.

"You don't need me. If you really needed me, you would have considered what you were throwing away when you kissed that girl at the coffeeshop. And when you kissed Strauss."

He stares at me.

I know those eyes.

When I went hunting with my father as a kid, we would chase deer and hares. We wouldn't shoot them of course, but when we released an empty bow, the sound of whooshing air would cause the animals to stop.

They would turn right in our direction.

And their eyes looked exactly like Will's eyes now.

"Yeah, I found out." I whisper.

He doesn't say a word.

"I didn't expect you to end up with Jake. I thought you would be with Doctor Reid, especially after you kissed him right in our living room," Will shot back quickly.

I choked.

"I don't care what I did in the past. I don't care what you did in the past. I know we both tripped up, but we have a beautiful boy at home. Do you remember him? His name is Henry. And I want him to believe a little longer that the prince ends up with the princess," he says, taking large strides towards me.

He pauses, leans down and kisses me gently.

"I want a divorce." I say softly but confidently when he pulls away from me.

At my words, his face crumbles. He freezes. I can feel his heart accelerate and his breathing speed up.

And then he drops his hand from my face and takes three steps away from me.

"I'll see to it," he says quietly. "But let's settle it amicably. For Henry."

I nod.

"Of course."

And we part ways for the second time; again with no hugs, no tears.

Just words.


End file.
